Nora is only 2!

Without a lot of confidence that my two granddaughters were going to understand me, I found myself involved in a  morning long conversation on the power of God to do what we are unable to do. They needed an explanation of what exactly the word 'power' meant. We discussed it for a bit and they liked the idea that it means, 'God has enough strength to do whatever it is He is going to do'. They were tracking for parts of it, and distracted at times by finding Archie at Trader Joe's or needing me to handle the scissors. But I persevered with application and illustration found in the morning's activities.

At one point Nora had been sent into a time out due to an infraction involving grabbing and tearing a temporarily treasured art work. As she came out smiling, she said, "God has enough power to change my heart!", which, if you think about it, is just plain brilliant.

Lash your heart to the ancient mast

There is a line in Andrew Peterson's latest cd, "lash your heart to the ancient mast". He is urging us to fix ourselves on the narrow and old road that leads us to God.

If you find yourself far from home, if you find yourself in heart numbing and soul dulling territory, if you are in a howling storm that has you blind and deafened to true north, then there is only one way back. There aren't choices that you can study like a menu. There aren't sophisticated options that can put a good spin on how much harm you have reaped for yourself. There is only one way back.

And that is to 'tie yourself to' what God has already said. He is good. He is strong. His ways lead to light and life. His ways also peel off our preferred image. And can cover our entire world with humility. And reveal to others (possibly before we understand this well) how desperately we have needed God to intervene.

My heart is beating a little faster. My mind is racing to keep up with my imagination. I find myself smiling kind of a lot. Why? There is a new little person out there who will call me Noni someday!

What could I do to....

Caveat: this is about marriage. And lately I've been thinking alot about what makes a strong marriage. Or a happy one, or a good one.

So how about we ask ourselves regularly this question: 'what could I do to make my marriage stronger.' This isn't a time to ponder what our spouse could do. Or how easier it would be if certain circumstances were different. But today, things being what they are, people being who they are, me being who I am right now, what could I do?

Could I realign myself with what I know I should do? (forgive much, speak with kindness, consider the other's interests are more important to me than my own, etc) Could I notice a trend that needs a Gospel application? Repentance is always the right thing to do. Or, could I see where my spouse needs to be righteously opposed in a way he has chosen?

A few months ago I was asked to speak at a friend's happy happy wedding shower. I came up with a top ten list of the bonuses of being married. Frankly some of them were silly, but the last one said,

"Best of all, to know the glory and joy and dazzle and death of giving happiness to an honorable man. For the rest of your life."

So today, the answer to myself, of what I could do is: To look for a way to give happiness to my honorable man.

A Rearrangement of Ideas

This is vintage Rich Mullins:

"God calls us to 'be strong' and we mistake that for a call to omnipotence. We confuse strength to endure trials with an ability to walk unfrustrated through life. We convince ourselves that if we were strong we would never fail, never tire, never hurt, never need. We begin to measure strength in terms of ease of progress. When our illusion of omnipotence is shattered we condemn ourselves for being weak..."

It is the kindness and mercy of God that so coordinates events to instruct us in how this thing really works. He has always been aware of my frailty and how regularly I need Him. If I walk blind to that truth, He is glad to open my eyes. It is His delight and His glory for me to need Him, to be aware of my need, to be grateful for His provision.

depraved indifference

I am lifting this title from a brief talk given by a fellow named Eric Ludy...

Indifference to another human's plight is spoken of in clear terms in Proverbs 24: 'Rescue those being taken away to death: hold back those who are stumbling to the slaughter. If you say, "Behold, we did not know this," does not he who weighs the heart perceive it? Does not he who keeps watch over your soul know it, and will he not repay man according to his work?'

How do you apply a teaching like this one? Where does this fit? I have had God use this to highlight my self absorbed agendas more than once. There are stages in my life that one could accurately describe my choices as ignorantly indifferent. Because I may not have been made aware of oppression or slavery or cruel need. But once I know, then my indifference is 'depraved'.

And this may seem so small as to be laughable or worse, but I cannot drink coffee that I know was harvested by unpaid and ill treated child slaves. Thousands of them toiling and dying. I cannot eat a piece of chocolate that is made from beans harvested by unpaid and ill treated child slaves. And if this is too paltry, then God, please lead me to a way that will effectively abolish slavery.

The 4th of July

Dale and I were singing the National Anthem the other day and both of us were surprised that we were moved to tears. As I was wiping my eyes, it seemed more real to me that this song was written during a battle. While Francis Key was waiting through that long and noisy night, others were fighting with all they had. Men were being wounded and dying. Property was destroyed as shells and bombs landed. And the burning question was, 'will we win?'

In the dark you couldn't see which flag was displayed over the port. You had to wait until daylight to see if Old Glory was still waving or if it had been replaced by the Union Jack. How excruciating! All that death and dying and exhausting labor, and not knowing if, in the end, you would lose. Or win.

Seems like a metaphor for life in this body. I know that the end of the story has a glorious victory for all of us. We will smile like cheshire cats at each other and praise the Lamb for what His sacrifice accomplished. But in this life, while still in this body, we can struggle to overcome. We can labor and fight the dark. And lose. Or win.

Joy is wafting

I was making iced tea so that I could offer more than water to our guests tonight. I felt this wafting, gentle, breeze around me as I reached up for the tea bags. Not moving air, but something internal. Margarita was in the living room and wants me to teach her to make pasta salad, so I was thinking how to break up the steps for her to be able to use the concept any way she wants once she returns to Monterrey. And I stopped to 'feel' that internal movement.

Ever since Monday when two little girls, daughters of Crystal's good friend, called me Noni I have felt this inner breeze. I do believe its joy.

Thanks, E.B.

I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.
E. B. White

I like this one. Sometimes the best way to thank God for what He has done is to enjoy it.

When my life is over I want...

This is from a documentary from Sara Groves:

When my life is over I don't want my kids to have seen me hug the wall. I want them to have an unforgettable image of me running, with my head held back.

Nashville rhymes with so cool.

It does if you pronounce it correctly, with the stress on the first syllable. Sort of.

Last night my little car pulled into our driveway after a long day on the road. I was tired but still feel a very strong satisfaction in having been able to see a recording wrapped up. After 6 days of being in the 'deep south' Crystal has 6 of her songs saved on her computer. Waiting for the project to be mastered is going to be hard! I want others to be able to hear what I heard.

Here is what it was like for the girls: Long hours of singing. Over and over again. Listening to different options and then singing some more. Andy Osenga's excellent ear and technical skills helping shape the songs. Lots and lots of laughing and conversations, but always getting back to work. Heading out twice a day to find a new place to eat. Meat and three is a great way to eat! Nebraska needs to try this! A hotel only 5 minutes from the studio so I could write. (I finished my story!) A tornado landed right downtown. I thought the midwest had the franchise on that. When you repeat the lyrics of a song, you notice the brilliance of those words. I got to do that every day. Crystal wrote songs from observing her life, and from describing how God is seen in every step of the journeys that make up her life. Getting to see sisters blend their voices. Watching Melissa work so hard to make the music better. She skillfully submitted her powerful voice to be smooth and harmonious.

My heart is full of gratitude.

words worth reading many times

Tonight we are having a Literary Night. To the uninitiated, this is a time where we bake up some treats. Pour out some beverages. Set up some good reading lamps. Pull into a circle and read select portions to each other. 'Select' can be funny or deep or a well written Christmas letter. It can be a journal entry or a dear john letter. I swear we were moved to tears on those readings. We have roared through James Herriott, even while the reader was fallen over sideways, wiping tears of mirth from his eyes.

I often default to Mark Twain. Perhaps because you cannot match his cleverness or self-effacement. His honesty is like a tonic. Like this, from his newly published autobiography:

By my count I have been in the right mood for competently and exhaustively feeding my ancient grudges in the cases of only thirteen deserving persons. It makes good reading. whenever I go back and re-read those little biographies and characterizations it cheers me up, and I feel I have not lived in vain. The work was well done. The art of it is masterly. I admire it more and more every time I examine it. I do believe I have flayed and mangled and mutilated those poor people beyond the dreams of avarice.

But then there is Wangerin writing about someone who has recently found the love of his life:

Chauntecleer healed more quickly than anyone else. This was not just because he had so strong a constitution, one well able to knit even the most open wound. But this was also because his spirits were so high. He laughed enormously and often, these days. He talked much, and he would talk on any topic available, to anyone who asked a question. And Chauntecleer began to fancy himself a philosopher. He stared up and spoke grandly of God and of the ways of the Deity.He disclosed the hidden patterns of his effective rule. And most particularly he discoursed on beauty- female beauty - its attraction to the male. And he smiled in his sleep these nights, Chauntecleer did, because his dreams were all good. And he healed very quickly.

The value of a night like this, of course, is to be introduced to other authors. I have been delighted to read the whole book after hearing a short reading. And I have learned to avoid an author after just a brief sample. Sorry Cameron, but Pride and Prejudice and the Zombies didn't make the grade with me.

What's this about relief?

What is it about relief and glad, glad news that makes it seem unnecessary to write? When I am deep into the weight of a struggle, I write to process my thoughts and my emotions about those thoughts. But when the struggle is over, when the weight is off, when the present view is so saweeeet, I do not need to write. I don't even want to.

So pushing against disinclination, here goes: I don't have to have any treatment for thyroid cancer this year. Maybe not even next year. I am free to put down things on the calendar that won't be squeezed around trips to Omaha. I am able to look ahead and smile. I am looking and smiling.

An Important Peace

This was a thought that a friend shared with me. Thanks, Jim.

Let's say a troubling thing has intruded into my life. Could be poor health, a rupture in a relationship, some crime committed against me. Something that is alarming, or painful, or scary as all getout.

It is what it is, and by God's good intention, produces a brilliant result in my life and in the kingdom...because He is determined to make His Name Great in my life. One of the evidences of God being there as His Beautiful Sovereign Self is the peace He gives (not as the world gives.)

But I can muddy up that shiny, crazy good thing by forfeiting peace. By amplifying anxiety or stewing in unforgiveness or slavishly preferring the non-strength of an idol. However my mode, giving peace away just makes the suffering so much harder! It would be like having someone come into my house and stealing my stereo. And then in my panic and distress, taking a big hammer to the tv, microwave, books, and ebook, just to make the theft more hurtful. It's an insane way to cope with loss. How much better to cast my care on my God who cares for me. How much kinder to my lacerated life to cease being anxious about how this thing will end up, and make my requests known to God who then trades my sorrow for His peace. What a good swap that is!

A Moment to Enthuse

These are two very special ladies in our lives. Nora, on the left, and her older sister, Addie.

Until you have a grandchild, its pretty difficult to make you understand the relationship that develops. Its beyond pride and joy. Its beyond pleasure and enjoyment. Its way better than chocolate and reading. Way better.

When Nora sees me she smiles so wide you can see all of her pretty teeth (there are 4 of them right now). Addie likes to call me Non (rhymes with phone), and pretty much has the best ideas for what to do when we play. When I was a young mom, I felt I needed to juggle chores with playtime. Not as a grandparent. I get to sit down on their level and be with them for however long they like, and play as long as their mom lets us.

The Hunters

Dale and Ben did all the freezing, stalking, waiting, shivering, and then aiming, shooting and dragging to bring these big boys home. We have freezers full of meat! Ben's weapon of choice is his new-to-him WWII era Russian issue, scopeless but with a really accurate sight. Two shots, two deer.











And then we roped some friendly men to do the skinning, carving, slicing and cubing.

Hunting

No pictures yet. But there will be. Oh my, there will be.

6 men and their rifles are heading out to the woods and fields of Boyd County. I am going to cook for them. And enjoy visiting with our hostess, Beth, because we never get enough time to do that.

And there will be legendary stories that this blog will chronicle. Stay tuned...

My Friends

Back in the last century (last millenium even!), like we're saying when I was a teenager, I met Linda and Karen. We were all youngish women who wanted to be involved in cross cultural evangelism. They both had husbands and children. I hadn't met Dale yet, and was on the wild side. Well, wilder than I am now. You will just have to take my word for it.

And we all ended up in Mexico. Living our years in villages in dusty, chilly, windy mountains. Learning languages and cultures. Raising our children to know Mexico as home. Adapting ourselves to limited supplies and different living situations. You should have heard us when our schedules allowed being together in the city. Or visiting each other in the village. Oh did we have stories! I recall the time we were booted from a restaurant because we were too......

And now we gratefully enjoy the moments we can grab here in Norfolk. Or during visits to Mexico. Wherever we can find each other, it's as if we have not been apart. So much of what shaped me shaped them the same way. We have known sacrifice but we have also known the sweetness of comradery. As we are all in different cities, and different careers, I love hearing about their worlds. And trust them to speak into my challenges. I love you two!

Rocky Point

So what if it was a loooong 24 hours of driving to get here. Or that our car didn't have air conditioning over the last baking desert heat. Rocky Point is so beautiful it makes the eyes tear up. Its such a perfect get-away that I swear my heart is beating slower. Picture extreme high and low tides, that regularly expose a coral reef and tide pools. Imagine 85 degree water with tumbling surf. Papaya, mangoes, guayabas, avocados, shrimp the size of my hand, with home made tamales and hand patted tortillas. Oh my. And Dale is here, right here, instead of somewhere else in a court room or on the road.

We certainly could get used to this.

Am I A Mission Trip Junkie? or not?

Today at church Dale and I and the rest of our Mexico 2010 team were allowed to show pictures and tell of how wonderful it was to be serving last May. It was a good reminder for us how much we enjoyed to be together. That we were allowed to see some pretty important changes in the Tarahumara church. That God has transformed people for His glory here and there. Wow.

After the meeting I joined my Thailand team that is heading to Asia next month so that we can help a group of foreign workers in a strategy conference. We hosted a fund raising spaghetti dinner to help with the finances. Somewhere as I was talking to a friend about last summer's India trip, and got to reconnect with the Mexico team and before the planning meeting with my Asia team, someone asked me how I like being involved to the extent that I am. He said something like, 'so its like a where's waldo with you. Find Lori in the mission trip slides!'

We laughed because its true! I look at this year and just marvel that God has allowed me to be invited to so many different trips. I have walked over such different terrains, shaken so many hands, eaten such distinct foods. Said hello in varied languages. Prayed with such beautiful saints. Felt the goosebumps of many, many images of my teams being transfixed at the beauty of what God let them see.

I spend much of my time back at home in gratitude of what I was allowed to know, and in prayer that each of us would be good stewards of what we now know.

And, to be honest, dream of the next trip. Can't lie, I frankly love this!